Rex Whistler Restaurant @ Tate Britain

I suppose I should take some solace from the fact the experience cost me nothing financially. Away from the dining room, a conversation with a surprisingly obliging, thoughtful and apologetic manager remedied that.

But before I go on, I want to clarify something: a negative restaurant experience really irks me. A bad gut reaction leaves me upset and doubting for a couple of days. For butter or wurst, my greatest highs and deepest lows happen when I am armed with cutlery. I am, I suppose, a manic depressive of the dinner table.

I wanted ‘Rex Whistler’ to be sensational. It constituted part one of my girlfriend’s birthday present. A tour around the gallery highlights followed by a leisurely lunch. A literal cultural feast. The pinnacle of British summertime provisions lovingly plated...

As the hands on my watch married at midday, we were shown to our table, a small blank square tetrised somewhere near the back of the green, oppressively muralled basement (formerly the director’s boardroom). Neighbouring tables - which I prayed not to be filled - could be bridged by a menu.

Our server, like most of the staff, was tangled into a strange sizel coloured apron with the tag prominently exposed. Plenty of paperwork was dispensed. This included the famous wine list. Thorough and inquisitively devised, although slightly hard to navigate initially (with respect to the stiff dividers) it had perhaps the most reasonable prices I have seen in a venue aspiring to fine dining. This is, I was told, a result of the restaurant’s policy to cellar bottles itself. Of course hanging on too long can have drawbacks, hence our oxidised '98 Paso Robles Tablas Creek Marsanne/Roussanne/Viognier.

Rather then use tongs, we were encouraged to rummage around a bulky bread basket. I rescued a brioche rectangle. It tasted encouraging: freshly feathering like candyfloss.

After flutes of strictly measured Billecart Champagne, it was time for plated pain. From a dismal menu, I chose the Victorian classic, Devilled Kidneys. Matt regurgitations arrived, beached upon allegedly toasted sourdough. The stained tableau had the visual grace of an enthusiastically squeezed old colostomy bagpipe.

‘Fresh’ dry, attrociously overly buttery Leak and Pea Tart, garishly garnished with a pubic tangle of chlorine scented Mixed Cress appeared to have been bought in. It came - and left us - inexplicably cold. Rather than ask if everything had gone okay, our waitress enquired if we had “got through it”. What admirable Bulldog spirit.

Within about two minutes of replacing cutlery, the main course incidents occurred. It soon became clear that this was a restaurant of two to three sittings (to compensate for the fact it is closed at night). My Rhug Estate Pork with Braeburn Relish and Buttered Carrots was lacklustre. Chefs sometimes machismatically describe their ‘death row meal’ in interviews. If by some twist of fate this became mine, execution might seem a suddenly attractive alternative. The belly was dehydrated: an insult to the organically reared Welsh pig which sacrificed Whistler its soul. Close by a till beeped like a checkout scanner. Tinitus.

My girlfriend’s Suffolk Chicken Breast with Roasted Tomato Tart and dribble of anaemic Sweet Corn Velouté visually evoked a toad squatting on a cirrhotic liver. We tugged at the lethargically undercooked pasty pat of a base before deciding the plated profanity was fatally unappetising. A side order of chips baked in dripping proved the chef’s apogee and simultaneously signalled his prospective career path.

On the next table, a lady looked astonished by her enormous coil of Loin of Smoked Bacon, a frankly libellous description, again served cool without warning.

For pudding, an acrid Gooseberry and Almond stack with Elderflower Sorbet looked like thumbs had shaped it. Perhaps an aspiring potter lurked behind the screens?

When I booked, I asked for a little touch to mark my girlfriend’s birthday. Quel surprise, nothing came: the birthday girl had to make do with a sodding, in parts splattered mural.

Despite generally good sourcing, when the kitchen has applied their particular whims, what lands is ungentrified pub food at posh prices, hectically served at a breakneck pace...
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Douglas Blyde
Overall rating
Food 3 | Service 6 | Atmosphere 5 | Value for money 4
Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Had a delicious, fresh and lovely lunch here on Sunday. Began with a fragrant, garden-fresh starter of lamb with broad beans and mint - amazing. I would have licked the plate if it wasn't such a classy place.

Really friendly service, an good range of wines (starting at £15) and lovely surroundings.

A bit expensive, though - you won't feel like you're getting that good value.
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George C
Overall rating
Food 9 | Service 8 | Atmosphere 8 | Value for money 6
Sunday, June 17, 2007

I was taken here last Sunday as surprise treat by my husband and was sorely disapoointed. We were 15 mins late for our reservation (due to the large queues at the excellent Holbien exhibition) and were told in no uncertain terms by the Head Waiter that this wasn't very good. After being shown to our table, we enjoyed (at a breakneck pace) a loveky starter and main course. The same waiter came over during the course of the meal to check ' we would be finished on time' and, I assume, to see if we were eating quickly enough. Apparently we weren't because we then had the dessert menus taken away from us (!) and were told that our time was up. We had been there for a little over an hour and a quarter. Upon leaving the restaurant we passed 4 empty tables... very poorly handled and just ruined a lovely treat. The rest of the staff were lovely and seemed really embarrased by this person's behaviour.
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Sarah
Overall rating
Food 8 | Service 2 | Atmosphere 7 | Value for money 5
Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Despite a very busy restaurant, the service received last Sunday lunchtime was absolutely spot on. So was the food, with highlights including a beef sirlon, beetroot and horseradish starter and monkfish perfectly served as a main course. As usual I blanched before paying extra for vegetables, but the portions were generous. The real attraction of this place is the wine list; a good strategy is to go for the half bottles. There are plenty of them, allowing one to mix and match or match wines to individual courses (thus avoiding the traditional problem of what to drink when one person has beef and the other fish). There is plenty of value to be had in the form of full bottles too - especially for those willing to spend a little more to get good claret. There aren't too many under £20 (but then where is there?) but enough between 20 and 30 to keep everyone happy. We'll definitely be back,
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Overall rating
Food 8 | Service 10 | Atmosphere 7 | Value for money 9
Monday, August 21, 2006

Once a month, on a Friday, they do dinner, and we gave it a try, our first time here. It passes every test: although a basement, it feels elegant and spacious, thanks to the beautiful Whistler murals; crisp heavy-feeling tablecloths and napkins; plates are warm; a brilliant wine list with moderate mark-ups; and delightful non-obtrusive staff. Dishes interesting and well-done, but not over-the-top. Artichike salad fresh and delicious, and chicken liver pate a dream; mains of poussin and sea-bass better than competent. Two halves of wine (Alsace Riesling and Beaujolais) were excellent. At £84 for two incl coffee and service good value. We’ll be back.
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David
Overall rating
Food 7 | Service 7 | Atmosphere 8 | Value for money 7
Saturday, April 08, 2006

Having been for the first time on two occasions in the last month, I can recommend this restaurant - although you will pay typical London prices, which may make it seem less than good value.

We have taken a child on both occasions and the good food and attentive staff, not to mention the generous space on offer and diversions of a leading gallery next door, make it an excellent option for parents (with money).

The staff are friendly, pretty attentive and sufficiently knowledgeable. The menu is simple modern British/Euro food with something for everyone, reasonable quality at typical London brasserie prices. The wine list is excellent and there are many really good and unusual choices, often scoring marks for good value too. Food tends to be delivered very efficiently and with a smile and they serve baskets of bread and crayons and paper for the children while you are waiting.

Table are laid out in a fairly spacious fashion and there is of course the joy of being surrounded by a panoramic Italianate Whistler mural for the duration of your stay. Recommended - I wish more public galleries and attractions had restaurants like this.
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Jules
Overall rating
Food 7 | Service 7 | Atmosphere 7 | Value for money 6
Sunday, February 12, 2006

This restaurant is only open for lunch, but it provides an oasis in the busy Tate Britain gallery. You have to walk through the cafe to get to the restaurant which is not the best enterance. When you enter you are surprised by the beautiful italinate landscape murals which offset the crisp white linen of the tables nicely.

The food is competent and good value. There is a varied and reasonably priced wine list. There is a good range of dishes to choose from. We started out just wanting a starter and main course, but we got tempted by dessert. There were 3 in our party all having different dishes and all were fine. The service was attentive.
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Overall rating
Food 7 | Service 9 | Atmosphere 8 | Value for money 8
Thursday, January 26, 2006