Beach Blanket Babylon (Shoreditch)

This is possibly the worst restaurant I have been to. It was a catastrophe from the moment me and my friends entered. I brought in a birthday cake; to only be informed it would cost £30 for them to bring it to our table after the meal. After making the same enquiry to another waiter they stated they would bring the cake out free of charge. We were then given the wrong menus to choose our food from and were only informed once we were ready to place our orders. When I finally placed my order I requested to have chips instead of potatoes; to which I was told that amendments could not be made to the menu. However, when my food had been served to me the change was made and my food was served with chips (clear miscommunication between staff). Just when we thought it couldn’t get worse after paying the bill the waitress gave us change which included American coins. Having informed the manager of all these problems not once did I get an apology, instead the only response I received from him was that he could not see how the whole situation had been an inconvenience to us. This restaurant has severely changed since my previous visit a few years back. After having such a horrible experience myself and friends will never eat from this disorganized restaurant again.
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Lindsay Walker
1 Overall rating
Food 1 | Service 0 | Atmosphere 4 | Value for money 0
Monday, December 05, 2011

The food is rubbish! My friend and I ordered the Pan fried stone bass with fondant potatoes and fried oyster. The fish was bland and I only got 2 small potatoes and one tiny oyster. My two other friends ordered the seafood Linguini. It was poor quality, I don't think my dog would have eaten that dish if it was given to him. The apple crumble was the worst I have ever tasted, lots of apple and a tiny bit of custard. My meal came to about £35-£40 and wasn't worth the money. Food is massively overpriced and we were all left hungry, extremely dissatisfied and angry. I had to make pot noodles when I got home.

I would not go back and I do not recommend this place - spend your money elsewhere.
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Samantha
2 Overall rating
Food 1 | Service 3 | Atmosphere 3 | Value for money 1
Saturday, March 12, 2011

The worst experience I've had for a long time. A 40 minute wait at the bar for a £7.50, plus 12.5% service, glass of Ernst & Julio Gallo wine (£26 for a bottle). No glasses or plates were cleared from our tables the entire night so by the end we were so deep in plates and glasses there was nowhere to put a drink down. And only 4 loos in the ladies to serve both the restaurant and bar. Beyond abysmal, I've never seen anything like it. The 9 star reviews on here look suspiciously like inhouse propaganda to me.
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Leigh
0 Overall rating
Food 0 | Service 0 | Atmosphere 0 | Value for money 0
Sunday, October 17, 2010

Unfortunately Saturday night was quite possibly the worst 'service' experience I have ever had to go through and put 14 of my closest friends through. It was a very important night for me as I was celebrating my 30th Birthday and assumed that such an establishment would have no issues when it comes to catering to a large group.

The evening started well. We were given the private area on the front left hand side of the restaurant. There was nothing marked on the tables in the area saying it was reserved for a party so whilst I was waiting for my 14 guests to arrive, a man and woman from another 'birthday' party group came and sat down. Logically and logistically speaking - that area cannot comfortably seat more than 1 big group so in eventuality - once everyone turned our - our party of 15 had to share this tiny space with 6 other people! So half of my group had to stand. If you could have informed me ahead of time that we were going to be sharing this space, I could have possibly advised the group - but they kept asking me who the strangers were.

Then at 9pm, we went up to the manager and asked if we could proceed to our table - which he replied would be ready in 15 mins. That's fine. The table still wasn't ready at 9.15pm and the Manager who I must say is the rudest, most arrogant person I have ever met (a discredit to the restaurant i'm sorry to say) - had the cheek to tell me that the reservation was for 9:30pm and not 9pm!! I'm sorry but I have in writing the booking confirmation which VERY Clearly states, 7.30pm for drinks followed by 9pm for dinner. And he tells me that he took the reservation himself and it was for 9.30pm?? And he says somebody called after to change it for 9.30pm? which really is ridiculous as i'm the only one involved with this booking aside for yourself and no such phonecall took place. I really am disappointed at his complete lack of any kind of apology for the mistake and his unability to take responsibility for the mistake that took and instead he blames me, the customer?

And it only got worse - 9.30pm got pushed to 9.45pm which got pushed to 10pm and my group actually sat down to the table at 10.30pm!!! which I think is incredibly ridiculous (we even had a pregnant person in the group!) And what was given for the 1.5 hrs we had to wait ? - a round of free bellini's - which i think is really ridiculous - i work in the industry and am a corporate event planner as well as having worked in various establishment of higher standing and I know what the 'cost' of a bellini really is.

Then once we were seated, no one came to take our drink orders - there was no water or beverage menu on the table - we had to speak to the Manager again! My fiancee told him we were not offered any beverages and he spoke back saying 'did you order any drinks?!' i'm sorry but in a service establishment at your level - i believe you have to 'serve' and ask if we would like some beverages and try to sell as opposed to customers trying to track you down and order.

And to top it all off, the waiter comes to me and asks me to sort out the main course numbers as there is an overcount! - this isn't my job!! - my friend had to go around the table and individually get everyone's main course order again - this was really terrible. Now we had to serve and take orders ourselves???

At the end of the night, they took service off the bill which was definitely something that needed to be done cause i wasnt going to pay for service when there was none. And they threw in 2 free desserts - wow, stop the press.

I'm not looking for anything to get anything from the team at Beach Blanket Babylon Shoreditch - I was hoping to have a great enjoyable night which was completely ruined by the Manager of that night and just everything that happened. Its a terrible thing to have happen to not just 1 person but a group of 15.
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Sabrina
3 Overall rating
Food 5 | Service 0 | Atmosphere 5 | Value for money 0
Monday, May 24, 2010

We booked a table for 30 on Saturday night. For the party size we had to pre-order from a very limited set menu a week in advance. 1st impressions were good, with the ratio of women to men being vastly higher on the feminine side. However things went downhill fast when correct money for two beers (£10.50) was handed to the barman who returned a look of disgust and shrugged sholders to emphasis unhappiness of not being given a tip for pulling two cold ones from a fridge.

Our reservation was for 21:00, presumably so they could sit and clear other parties before ours. Clearly not. We were spit up onto the 5 booths at the back of the restaurant so our xmas party became 5 smaller parties. Our starters came out at 23:00, two hours after being seated. Mains started to trickle out around midnight, with desserts emerging as the lights came on at closing time - 01:00.

After sitting us on 5 separate tables they then wanted us to pay all on one bill, claiming it was easier for them. Obviously so since they couldn't manage to serve dinner in under 4 hours. They gratiously dropped the service charge, however with the service staff being more concerned about pouting and being good looking all night it was no surprise that we were starved like captive animals all night. The front of house service girl was exceptionally good looking in the grey dress, however spent the entire night talking and flirting with her boyfriend rather than making the customers feel welcome.

The food itself was rather poor. Despite being served late the portions were small and lacking in any real taste. Jamie's homeless kids at Fifteen could've prepared better meals before their intensive training.

The night was wrapped us nicely with the bouncer theatening to call the police after we refused to pay for a couple bottles of wines that tasted like ass but were priced at £25. Management called the dogs off and we were escorted out with a request to never come back. One thing I don't think they will have to worry about.
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Jordan
1 Overall rating
Food 1 | Service 0 | Atmosphere 3 | Value for money 0
Monday, December 07, 2009

Possibly the worst meal I've had this year that didn't come from a van. We booked a 6.30pm table and when we arrived at 6.15pm there were only half a dozen other customers. The staff were milling around and eventually a guy with only the most tenuous grasp of English took our drinks order. 25 minutes later, no drinks. I flagged him down and he simply shrugged. 5 minutes after that I could see our drinks on the bar.... I was tempted to get them myself but resisted, just to see how much longer we would have to wait. Luckily I had a carton of Umbongo in my bag so my guests and I were able to survive.

After 45 minutes our drinks arrived. They were drinks. In glasses. It wasn't rocket science.

The menu is very very boring. I'm not sure what I expected but it wasn't fish and chips and steak.. That said, fish and chips (with mushy peas) and steak seemed like the best options.

To start I had a 'classic' prawn cocktail. Now, this isn't a hard dish to create. It's just prawns in a sauce made of ketchup and mayonnaise. Some people add a dash of worcester sauce or tabasco to the sauce. In fact, you'd get no complaints if you bought it ready made from M&S.

It was disgusting. The prawns were clearly frozen when they went into the sauce and as they thawed the water from them turned the sauce into a watery sludge. Horrible.

My fish and chips arrived. I had asked the waiter what the fish was. He didn't even understand the question.. 'it's fish' he said. 'What species ?' I asked. 'Fish' said the waiter.

It was haddock. And it was quite good. Everything else was dire. It came with fries not chips. Fries are an abomination. My friend's steak came with chips. So they had chips but decided to use fries with the fish. Bonkers. The mushy peas should have been a big green blob on the plate. Like a melted Goblin. In fact it was a tiny teaspoon of mushy peas in a tiny little dish that would not look out of place in a dollshouse (like Barbie had thrown up after too much guacamole). I ate the mushy peas in one flourishing spoonful. It tasted of peas and was mushy.

Dessert was a Knickerbocker Glory and a baileys creme brulee. The KBG was OK, after all it's mostly ice cream and cream in a glass . The creme brule was inedible. It was piping hot when it should be served cold. They must have slammed it under the grill to melt the sugar topping and forgotten about it. As a result the custard had curdled and separated into a watery snot. I didn't eat it. The waiter didn't even comment.

We asked for coffee only to be told, with another shrug, that the machine was broken.

When the bill came I paid with a credit card. The waiter went away. We were collecting our coats when he ran up asking for my credit card again because he had forgotten to put the wine on the bill. His error. I should have told him that he was out of luck and left. In fact, any decent restaurant wouldn't have bothered to ask for my credit card twice. But this is not a decent restaurant. Of course, I paid. Because I'm a mug. The price was £70 a head. I'd pay that to have the waiter's head on a spike but otherwise it's not good value.

The customers are a weird mix of Hoxton/Shoreditch types (none of whom are actually from Shoreditch) and middle aged, greasy suited, city men who think they've discovered some cool place off the beaten track where they can have a good perve at the waitresses legs and still get the 10.15 from nearby Liverpool Street back to their sad little Essex homes. Not a nice mix...

I am originally from Tower Hamlets and while development in East London is welcome, places like this are not. I also lived in Essex for some time and have nothing against it (apart from Jamie Oliver)... it's the greasy suits that live there that I don't like... but if you DO like them then get yourself down to Beach Blanket Babylon, have yourself a spoonful of mushy peas. Tell them I sent you.
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Andy Charles
0 Overall rating
Food 1 | Service 0 | Atmosphere 0 | Value for money 0
Friday, October 09, 2009

Probably the worst bar/restaurant experience ever. Arrived on time to be told by the very rude girl on the door that the table wasn't ready and to have a drink at the bar. No apology. Took us half an hour to get served. No apology. Seated an hour after our reservation time. Guess what? No apology! When we got to our table, our waitress then gave us the hard sell and tried to get us to buy a £100 bottle of vodka - I don't expect to be sold to when I'm trying to look at the menu in a restaurant! She then went on to tell us this was probably the best option, as the bar was 'slow' and cocktails could take a long time. Professional!

Food arrived minus one main course. Two of the other dishes were stone cold. We sent them back and they arrived around the time the rest of our party were finishing their meal but were tepid at best. Half a bottle of our wine was also given to the table next to us, as we were for some reason sharing an ice bucket. In terms of the quality of the food, it's like a very, very poor man's Browns. So bland and unremarkable for the price. Did not taste fresh at all.

Thoroughly fed up, I asked to see the manager who looked like a broken man. I had the feeling other tables were complaining too. He agreed to discount the bill without a fuss, as this obviously happens a lot.

Would rather go to KFC than go back here - avoid at all costs. Food is rubbish, staff are rude.
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Ellie Hailey
0 Overall rating
Food 0 | Service 0 | Atmosphere 0 | Value for money 0
Sunday, September 13, 2009

We had the worst dining experience ever at Beach Blanket Babylon. Not only was the food cold and tasteless but we had to wait forever. It was a wednesday night and there was a incredibly bad band playing in the back ground which made it even harder to swallow our food. There were more band members than clients but that still did not stop the rude staff from messing up our order and making us wait forever.

The cocktails were truly amatuerish and very weak. I don't mind paying almost £10 for a drink but it has to be worth it. The staff do not look happy to be there at all. There is a real sense of desperation to the whole place. I would give them points for trying to ride out this crisis but judging from our horrible experience, I don't think they care about what the customers think. Thats why its so empty and desperately awful.
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Harold Marsden
0 Overall rating
Food 0 | Service 0 | Atmosphere 0 | Value for money 0
Saturday, May 02, 2009

Went to Beach Blanket over the weekend with my boyfriend as we were around area, its a hard place to avoid, but as we had never been in we though of giving the place a chance and at the door we were greeted by the host, who kindly told us there were no tables available so we stayed and had a few cocktails at the bar.

The cocktails were really nice and refreshing, atmosphere was great as the staff were attentive and recommending drinks, made as feel really welcomed.

By reading previous reviews i can say people most certainly take it over exaggeration as Beach Blanket Babylon is an experience everyone should try and get there on opinion.

Had a great evening trying different taste of mixtures.

It was worth my time and money. Should try and you might just addicted.
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Marta
9 Overall rating
Food 9 | Service 9 | Atmosphere 10 | Value for money 9
Tuesday, April 28, 2009

I took my mum to Beach Blanket Babylon in Shoreditch for mothers day and had a really nice evening. The restaurant was fairly busy and although our server seemed a little rushed she was poilte, attentive and helpful. The food was good and the coctails were original and well made.

I will deffinately be going back.
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Danielle
9 Overall rating
Food 8 | Service 10 | Atmosphere 9 | Value for money 8
Monday, March 23, 2009